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Situation Vacant: Mother

It's Mother's Day in this part of the world and though I'm not a fan of commercial holidays, I like this one because mothers often go under-appreciated and it's good to be thought of and given some pampering! As a special post, I thought it would be fun to write a job ad for a mother - it's my tribute to moms everywhere.

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SITUATION VACANT: MOTHER


Position: Primary caregiver to human child

Job Title: Mother/Mom/Mummy/Mama

Job Description:
Primarily responsible for raising and caring for a child from a infant to adolescent stage. Duties will differ depending on the age and developmental stage of the child. Initial duties will include feeding, cleaning and looking after every need of a child who would be entirely dependent on you for assistance with sleeping, burping, bathing, turning over and everything else. You will also have to play the role of entertainer, nurse and guardian to the child. As the child's developmental skills improve, you will be responsible for assisting them with walking, eating, talking and playing. Further along, you will have to play the role of counselor, judge, driver, teacher and friend.

Requirements: 
  • Candidate should be willing to survive on very little sleep (less than five hours a day), especially in the beginning.
  • She should be willing to learn on the job as no formal training is provided.
  • She should be ready to face challenges of all types such as unexplained crying, tantrums, indiscipline and illnesses.
  • Often, the candidate will have to function alone as no team will be provided. She can enlist the help of a 'partner' or 'assistant', but on her own initiative.
  • The candidate will often come across some co-workers and other individuals who may be judgmental and rude. Tackling them is her responsibility though she may team up with other co-workers for help.
Working Hours: Candidate will be on-call 24/7 (even if she is moonlighting on another job).

Payment: Mostly in kind. You will receive unconditional love from the child.

Benefits: Lifelong benefits of love and appreciation from those around you.

Please Note: Selection of candidates may take up to nine months.

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Happy Mother's Day!

Would you apply for this job if you knew what it would entail?

(Pic: Mother And Baby by Anna Langova)
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2 comments

Richa said...

You bet donning the hat of a mother isn't that easy! It takes a lot out of your daily routine, your energy and sometimes even giving up on a lot of things you like to do for the sake of your kids. But when you see your child enjoying in front of your eyes you feel its all worth it.

Very well put Tarana!

TK said...

Thank you Richa!

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